Hey everyone,
Well this is my first blogg on here and i would like to take this time and talk about something compleatly stupid and probably pointless. This is going to be a breaf intro to me. Meaning my story everyones got one and i think mine is kinda interesting... duhh i was there. Sorry... n e way. the one good question is how to begin. like said in Interview with a Vampire "should i begin like david copperfield, i was born, grew up, or should i start when i was born into darkness as i call it."
OK here it goes i might bore you but who knows you may just enjoy it... you never know untill you try...
I was a typical kid growing up both parents.. two older brothers, which ment that i kept getting picked on an such cause i was the "baby." my dad worked for nabisco so that ment he brought home cookies afew times a yr..lol my mom was an accountant not a big fancy corperate pay check but she enjoys what she does. My dad was in the viatnam war he got really beat up there and he drank beacuse of it.. and no he never hit me, my brothers, or my mom.. my oldest brother is 12yrs older than i and my other brother is 2yrs older. I dont understand the gap but hey whatever. my oldest brother was never around cause he was and still is a perpetual studant. The other in my youth was a jackass, actualy he still is. but he was always there. well there are only two major points in my life that i can remember from younger than 10. at age 5 i got hit bay a car in garfield nj and at age 6 or 7 i had a birthday party schedualed at burger king i invited my whole first grade class. my birthday came and not a soul showed.. i spent the rest of that b-day crying in bed
Looking back i guess i was the annoying lil brother. always hanging around him and his friends. Which wasent really a good thing. I started smoking at 10, along with weed and alcohol. but thats not the half of it.. i would hangout with them and they teased the hell out of me like older kids do one day they threw fire crackers at me fun huh.. well also around this time since i was hanging out with a bit older crowed were going threw differnt things than i. they were playing truth or dare.. you my see a bit of forshadowing here.. well one day my brother and mom were out and one of his friends who lived acrost the street came by and was waiting for him so i thought nothing of this cause he has done this b4. i think n e way? we ended up playing a 2 person game of T or D and ya stuff happend.. well for the next yr or so he would call me up and we would do stuff together. yes that kinda stuff... after a while i started not to like this stuff and when he called me i said i dident want to do this n e more i wanted to go str8. he said come over n e way i did and he started to pay me. that dident last more than another few months and i just shut him out no worries, long story short "too late" ya my first experrances were with a dick head guy big shock there.
Ok as you can see im just stating the major moments and not alot of hey my toy broke or stuff like that. Moving along and jumping ahead to 14ish. around this time i met my friend brandon im mentioning him cause he is still my bestfriend. we hung out alot and no not like that. pretty much everyday. right b4 this time in my life i got into metallica and grunge music. and when i met brandon is when i got into the "goth scene" we would run around the mall in full makeup and stuff. well one day i came home with my nails panted black and my ear pierced and my dad fliped shit grabed my ear ring and started tossing me around the kitchen. into the stove, the sink, and table saying "what you want to be a faggot" and shit like that this was the only time he layed his hands on my like that. well i packed up some shit and walked over to whos house Brandons the next day my mom begged me to come home. that was the last i ever heard that shit from my dad. i had stoped smoking weed and all the other shit i was doing except for drinking on occasion, i still smoked cigarettes though. summer of 98 was awesome. i was 15 and my dad liked brandon more than any of my brothers friends, so much in fact that he said he could come on vacation with us.
While on vacation in Wildwood crest, NJ my dad treated brandon like one of his own kids. when we wanted to go to the boardwalk he would give him money just as he did me and my brother. i was dumbfounded he never did that b4.. n e way my brother was 17 and he brought a bottle of everclear with him on vacation. which he promptly mixed with oj when we got to the hotel. well while we walked around the hotel we found a group of chicks and my brother invited them to hangout and they were leaving the next evening as i recall. n e way while we were hanging out in a shady spot i think it was in the parkinglot. we were passing around the bottle orsomething we might of drank the everclear later on i dont remember it too well. back on topic, he asked the girls a question "which one of us would you fuck?" i know real mature.. one girl said him or brandon. the other girl stayed silent. after waiting for her to answer we changed the subject and then he girl whi remained silent leans over to me and whispers "i would pick you" i just sat there grinning. well nothing happen with her.. and they left the next day. well me and brandon wanted to just hangout on the boardwalk away from my brother. we were just going threw the stores and arcades. while we were playing Area 51 which was near the door i spotted a cute chick waiting by the bathrooms. i looked at brandon and said we should go say hi. he said later then i was like shes waiting for someone in the bathroom she wont be there much longer. lol he said true and we walked over turned out her name was morgan and she was waiting for her friend lisa. well we ended hanging out with them the rest of the trip. well there was one night we went over to their hotel room. well morgans dad was there so we went to the boardwalk and watched the sun rise or something well to finnaly close this paragraph me and morgan ended up making out under the boardwalk for hours and i had my first kiss with a girl and actualy i made it to second base. woohoo for me!!
Ok well the summer is now over and im still 15 now i go to highschool.. i wanted to go to a tech school but i dident get acepted.. so i was kinda pissed off that i dident get into the school i wanted and they also schedualed my lunch for last period so i cut class alot to take lunch after afew days i just cut classes from 4th to 12th taking every lunch. well one weekend i decided to make smoke bombs out of my model rocket engins cause they are solid fuel and smoke alot. well this dident go well and it litteraly went off in my face and i got first and afew second digree burns on my face and neck and brandon inhaled alot of smoke. well i go to school that monday sept 28th it was and i got arrested for terrostic threats and possesion of an explosive device. the bomb squad searched my house while i was in the police station. well they sent me to juvie the court prosses was long and drawn out well that november the judge said i could go home on the ankel braclet i went home smoked 2 packs that nioght my mom bought me a carton of marlboros. well i had a good night sleep and i woke up at 10am the doorbell rang... i went and answerd it. it was the guy who set up the bracelet with two officers... wtf well they said due to my psych evals i had to go back to lockup.. well they let me smoke 2 more cigaretts and they brought me back. well i went to court every two weeks or so till febuary when they released me from lockup. but they said i couldent go home and dyfs (divison of youth and family services) got me into a teen center in totowa and i was going to school in the challange program which was a rehab for teens. they dident feel comfortable with me in public schools... while in this program i was bored as hell so i noticed one of the kids had a radio that dident work so i took it apart and fixed it and gave it back to him. then one of the guys watching us brought in a vcr that dident work and i fixed that lol. well dyfs also set me up a big brother kinda thing and he took me to see my family and my house which i havent been since last november. saw brandon and i also got all the christmas presents that i dident get in december cause i was in lockup. holidays in lockup blew. but n e way i was in the teen center till april..
After the teen center Dyfs sent me too look at abunch of inpatiant behavure mod programs cause istill couldent go home i saw three i kinda settled on one called Willowglen in Andover, NJ. the day i went there to get settled in it was April 9th 1999. ill never forget that day. i went threw orientation. saw the class i was going to be in and met with my tharapist/social worker. they explained the rules which were mostly common sence.. while i was in lockup i was a model inmate never got into trouble afew fights that the guard turned his head too but nothing major. i knew this wasent going to be n e differant. well they showed me to my room and talked to my mom earlier in the day and after a while it was time for lights out. after i just fell asleep i was woken up cause ihad a phone call. i remember they said i couldent get phone calls this late in the evening. and i asked why they were letting it they just said come and take the call or something like that. we passed the phone in the hall and went to the meeting room where i did my orientation. this confused me alot. i picked up the phone and it was my mom or brother i dont remember but they said that my dad just died... i dident even know he was sick or n e thing. i threw down the phone and went to my room and cryed myself to sleep. the next day i left with my mom and the program let me stay away for a week for the wake and so on. that first night was the only nite i cryed really over this. the wake went on like expected if you have been too one... n e way i went back to the program and as expected i excelled at what i was soposto do my levels went up and i was in the group home in no time also i went home every weekend when my levels were high enough. the levels were how they judged ur behavure. on one of my home visits i was at the mall with brandon as per usual we were smoking out side the food court at willowbrook mall we were hocked up on this stuff we bought from hottopic called crave which was pretty much pure sugar. we introduced our selves to this cute girl or at least i thought she was cute and me and her pretty much started going out. this is the girl that showed me Rocky Horror Picture Show which i frequented almost every saterday night, and i would go back to the program durring the week. well i got released it aug. of 00 i beleave when i was 17.
At this time i had gotten my licence and also kept going to Rocky on weekends. i was getting ssi checks cause of my dad and i was living it up. bought video games paid my car insurance and got a cell phone. me and that girl broke up btw her name was Jessica yentama i dunno how to actualy spell her last name but u get the picture. i was going to rocky every weekend. well one day i got in toutch with this girl whom i havent seen since i was 14 her name was Mandy i never knew her last name. but n e way one day she was hanging out with me and we started to hook up and next thing i knew she was riding me. btw yes i used a condom... n e way after that night i pretty much never heard from her again. it was like the ending of american pie. "i was used!!!" n e way thats how i lost my virginity to a girl... at rocky there were alot of hookups and afew very few one night stands. untill febuary of 01 thats when i met russel edgar. no he was never my b/f but ill get to why this is relavent in a min. one day at rocky i met him he had just broken up with his g/f and we were talking at Willys Diner down the road and he was telling me how she fucked his head up n stuff. well i said "ill never date a girl like that." well the next week i dident see him but i saw this hot chick. her name is ariel fyi. well i dident go to the diner that week and just went home but i got her number :-D. i called her the next day. and shortly there after we were going out. the next weekend me and her went to rocky and she walked away to introduce me to her exb/f and yes it turned out to be russ. she was like "russ this is my new b/f...." and russ was like "Steve!!!" she just shook her head as far as i recall. well three months go by and she broke up with me june 10th infront of rocky just afew days b4 my birthday. well i was fucked up for months i was in love with her and to this day i still harbor feelings for her but its not the same i really care about her. i doubt anything is ever possable again but hey we move on. shortly there after i was a huge slut. also me, russ and brandon hung out quite often infact the summer i got dumped me russ and brandon went on a road trip to canada. ya that fell short when they wouldent let us in. brandon slept the whole time so it was just me and russ taking turns driving. after our failed entry to canada which was cause by brandon not having proper id russ dident have paperwork about some bullshit court stuff and me not having n e cash, russ financed the trip. well somewhere in NY state we pull out a map of the eastern seaboard and i closed my eyes and droped my finger landed on Bar Harbor, Maine. and so we were off. when we got htere we very soon found out this is a vacation sopt for rich people and were very out of place three guys wearing all black and in trench coats who have been on the road for over a week. ya we were out of place. well off we went again but this time we decided to drive down the coast home. while still in maine it was night brandon and russ were asleep i was starting to fall asleep at the wheel and was half dazed and hit one of those padestrian signs that kinda flop. well russ woke up and was like what was that. i took advantage of the situation and was like "dude i just hit a padestrian............sign" he still hates me for that. after that we only really saw gass stations cause we stayed off major highways and such we dident really see food till CT it was a 7-11. well after that we got stuck in traffic just out side hartford and then a huge rain storm that was so bad we had to pull off the road. and took a shower in our boxers in the rain. it was interesting, i wonder what the people driving by were thinking? n e way we made it back in time for rocky 2weeks after the start.
the next major thing was the following febuary... what is it about that month? maybe it was january? n e way that is when i met my soon to be wife... at rocky none the less. n e way i stole her pants and made her walk around in the freezing cold. it was a fun night. well to make that story short she came home with me and never left. we got inguaged and had a kid got married a yr later. and were together for 6yrs.. durring that time twards the end of that stint i had lost afew jobs got into drugs hard, overdosed went to the hospital, got arrested several times the last of which was march 16th 06 i spent just shy of a month in passaic county jail melanie my wife had moved to her moms house while i was locked up. march 16th 06 was the last day i really did drugs. since my great sobering experance lol even robin willams said it best that a grand jury is a very sobering experance. the april that i came back home and i said the only way mel could come back was if she was detoxed. well the day b4 she was fully detoxed she asked to come home. after much debate i agreed.. well for the rest of that story u could checkout my myspace at Myspace.com/Spikiesteve if you would like ill paraphrase it down she left me for russ. we are still civil. lol well thats mostly my life untill now. i still hangout with Brandon once in a while he has a job now at The Bar in clifton, nj. Russ still has Melanie, they have plans to have their own place. My kid Steven jr is currently living here my mom mostly takes care of him as per the court and Dyfs me and mel still have full custady shes just taking care of him till one shit settles down. Ariel is in collage and is doing well from what i hear we talk once in a while as well. My middle brother is in the Navy and could care less about him. My oldest brother is a Cridical Care Trasport Nurse he gets all the bloody people.. lol well thats my life the abridged version if you care to know more detail about n e point message me at my myspace, bitcomit. My aim is refeicul so is my yahoo
