I've been pretty busy with BS busywork lately. Add that to my new pot free lifestyle and we get a complete lack of motivation for writing posts. Still, I've made time the last two fridays and I think I'll keep up the tradition.
I guess it's not all bad. My schedule is tiring, and in my view pointless, but it gets me out of the house, and there are two smoking hot girls involved, so I'd call it breaking even.
I miss smoking terribly, though. I have no idea how I made it this far considering I don't even want to quit. Being broke must be a large part of it. The constant presence of a father I am growing extremely resentful of must also be a factor, certainly. But what happens next time I have some cash and nobody around to guilt me? My guess is a very stoned me and a pack of smokes that disappears even faster than before.
So... yeah. Hate to disappoint, but I still think clean living is a crock of shit. I have no desire for a longer life, why stay healthy? I'm broke, I'm alone, I have nothing in my life that counts as a reason to live by my standard. I don't drink, so what's wrong with me sparking up a spliff when I feel like it, gaddammit?
Damn this whole situation.
