Movie

Sign In | Sign Up

Thorgaz.Learn to squirt & software down links

Well am a young 38year old Blackburn lad in the north of England.So why am i here?well apart from the normal thing.am also here to move on in life.As

My Profile

thorgaz
25079
.....
Points: 77
Gender: Male
Constellation: Libra
RSS Add Friend

Shortcuts

Categories

Calendar

Y M
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat

My Posts

!!CALLING ALL PEGLEGS!!
Thu Aug 14, 08 07:42 PM | Category: All

All unipeglegs

th_ghtright, heres the fucking deal, i've only gone and got meself a swanky fanfuckingtabulous new false leg (i dont need it, i just like to look fucking funky) well this ones the fucking business cause its got an inflatable foot woohoo!!, anyway i'm fucking lumbered with a pile of size 10 left shoes, (if i'm brutally fucking honest, it never looked quite right cause me real foots a size fucking 4) so i'm sticking the bustards on e-bay, i'm willing to swap a brown jesus sandal for one of these wooky looking fucking things here, the size does'nt matter (like i said...blow up toes woohoo!!) i'm fucking relying on you lot to get all ya legless mates to boost me funds here so get the cunts told to start bidding........bloody now that means ok!!!!!!!!!!!
See more details
funny
Quote | Report Reads (1418) | Comments (5)
FUCKING FANCY DRESS
Thu Jul 31, 08 08:20 PM | Category: ! FUNNY !

!FUCKING FANCY DRESS!

there i was one day in a full size fucking teletubby suit, the bairns done up as nelly the elephant, moaning like fuck cause his trunks keep dragging on the ground. off we fucking trot to the party of one of the posh kids from school. they can`t just sling the kids in the garden with a box of pringles to fight over, oh no, they`ve gotta have a fucking fancy dress extravaganza at a posh hotel and naturally the parents have to dress up as well so they can take the fucking piss!. well the bus was fucking fun i can tell you cause i had the fucking head on did`nt i?, old twats giving me the eye, making comments about the size of me in a teddy suit, "i`m not a teddy actually", i shouted "i`m tinky winky, so fuck off miserable twat". anyway, we get there after what seems like a fucking week, we burst in the doors thinking we`re the bees knees and what do we see?, we`ve only gatecrashed a fucking wake have`nt we?. the bairns shouting "wheres the balloons?", well i did`nt know where to put me fucking twatin face, i did the only thing i could; i took my head off as a mark of respect and run like fucking cunt!!!!.
See more details
funny
Quote | Report Reads (3573) | Comments (1)
!Blackburrys waist a f*ucking time!
Sun Jul 27, 08 01:38 PM | Category: ! TURE !
Who thr fuck called it a Bloody Blackburry?
th_funny-9f*cking hell man, me brains frying like f*ck!!, some clever c*nts give me a blackberry and its driving me b*stard mad!!, it wont do nowt i f*cking tell it so its had a smacked a*se and a couple of drop kicks down me garden, i've rang me mate to sort it out, but she's p*ss useless, her best suggestion was to ask it nicely and stop screaming at it, f*cking cabbage!, if it does'nt do what i'm f*cking telling it soon, its going down me f*cking bog and i'm gonna sh*t on it!! ANYWAY................on a happier note, me mates mate had the all clear from the clap clinic, she'll be on the f*cking prowl the night so watch yaself!!
See more details
True_funny
Quote | Report Reads (1098) | Comments (1)
! BOBBLE HATS & OLD TIMER'S
Thu Jul 24, 08 07:02 PM | Category: DID I BLOODY DREAM T
! F*uking bobble hats,n old women !
do i look the type to wear a f*cking bobble hat?. me neighbours been in with a bag of old f*cking crud, sorting out she calls it, palming off your old sh*t i call it. she's f*cking sitting there bringing all this old tat out one by one, expecting me to be p*ssing meself with exitement. you've seen nowt f*cking like it, long johns, socks, braces and her f*cking old underware,(as if i would ware bitch's underware)(is she trying to tell me something) then she gets it out, the f*cking bobble hat!!. "that better f*cking not be for me" i said, "i made it for you especially, cause i know you like black" she says, now fair enough i know she's senile, but i've told her straight, if she ever darkens me door with a hat like that again, i'm gonna tell her family she's hoovering the grass and get her f*cking sectioned!!.  
See more details
funny_humour
Quote | Report Reads (617) | Comments (0)
!GYPSY F*UKING CUNT !
Wed Jul 23, 08 08:11 PM | Category: ! TURE !

!GYPSY F*UKING CUNT !

i've only had a row with a f*cking gypsy!! there he is, f*cking bobble hat on his head, banging f*ck out me door, "oi, what do you want you hacky tw*t" i'm shouting, you've seen nowt like the sh*t he's trying to flog, piles of crud from the f*cking pound shop and the cheeky c*nt wants 5 quid for it!!, i told him straight to p*ss off and take your stinky f*cking offspring with you. He's f*cking wingeing on about living in a f*cking caravan, "round here thats a f*cking holiday home" says i, "so go and tell someone that gives a sh*t", well he starts bleating on about f*cking cursing me and all that b*llocks, "your too f*cking late" i'm saying "some f*ckers beat you to it", on he starts again about this f*cking caravan!! "have you got a kettle in it?" says i, "aye" he says, "well f*ck off and go & boil your f*ukin bobble hat!!"
You annoying tw*t!!!!
See more details
funny_humour_Believe
Quote | Report Reads (1274) | Comments (0)
BLOODY RESTURAUTS
Wed Jul 23, 08 07:51 PM | Category: ! FUNNY !
!WHAT AN IDIOT!
everyones a f*cking critic, there i am minding me own f*cking business munching on me beetroot sarnie. this miserable looking tw*t comes up. "you cant eat that in here", "why the f*ck not, its mine" says i, "you can only eat food that you've bought in this restaurant", "f*ck off" i says "i'm not eating that sh*te", "anyway, i'm only waiting for me mate so f*cking do one", "well in that case, you'll have to leave" he says, "oh is that f*cking right is it?", well i went straight to the manager, "here that f*cking retard down there says theres no vegetables allowed in here, now me mate might not be the sharpest tool, but no f*ckers calling her that!!". shes over the f*cking moon cause she thinks i stuck up for her, f*cking cabbage!!!.
See more details
humour_funny
Quote | Report Reads (616) | Comments (0)
Fucking Shoping Center's! Twats !!!!
Sun Jul 20, 08 07:51 PM | Category: ! TURE !

FREE DRINK !

WHAT A GREEDY F*CKING BITCH!!, these c*nts that give the free sh*t away in the shops?, stay away from the f*ckers cause they're greedy t*ats, there i am skipping round to the pic'n'mix for me usual pocket full, when this lass shouts "do you want some of this vodka?", well f*ck me man, theres the sign above her head in lights "free drink" and i'm floating down the aisle like the f*cking bisto kid, "giz a big one babes cause i'm f*cking gagging" i'm saying, "you can only have a measure like everyone else" she says, "dont be so f*cking stupid man, what f*cking goods that to me?",......
See more details
funny
Quote | Report Reads (1021) | Comments (0)
Stupid ! look it up & tell me if [Lisa] is there.lol
Sun Jul 20, 08 07:44 PM | Category: ! BELEAVE IT OR NOT

Stupid ! just look it up & tell me if my mate's name is there ?

I absof*ckinglutely cant believe how paggered me mate is, she's got herself in with this right f*cking dipsh*t of a bloke, she's going on and f*cking on about how f*cking brilliant he is and all this b*llocks, then she tells me how he was nearly killed and he's a f*cking war hero, so i'm asking her where he's been and she says he's been fighting for the salvation army but he's been pensioned out cause someone tried to shoot his f*cking leg off, "dont talk f*cking sh*te" i'm shouting, "he was" she's saying, "i've seen the scars, they look like a map", "he's got varicose veins you f*cking idiot" i'm shouting, well i'm f*cking p*ssing meself at this point and she aint f*cking happy, "what the f*ck else has he told you?" i'm saying, "well his lazy eye is from the gun poking him in the face and he's got warts on his nose cause he was allergic to the uniform", i've proper f*cking p*ssed meself by now and she's starting to f*cking realise he's a lying c*nt, thats when she finishes me off, "so do you reckon he's full of sh*t about his nob only being bent cause the shrapnel shot up his pipe?", f*cking hell, i cant type no more, i've gotta change me boxers!! lol.
[Well please feel free to comment n thanks far your time! Later's (Gary)]
See more details
funny
Quote | Report Reads (913) | Comments (1)