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Thu May 22, 08 11:27 AM
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THOSE ARE MY RULES
Typical macho man married typical good-looking, sexy gal and after the wedding, laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want, and at what time I want, and I don't expect any hassle from you. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing when I want with my old buddies, and don't you give me a hard time
about it.
Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Here are my rules: there'll be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
17 CHILDREN
Maria is a devout Catholic. She gets married and has 17 children.
Then her husband dies. She remarries two weeks later, and has 22 children by her next husband. Then he dies. A while later, she dies.
At the funeral, the priest looks skyward and says, "At least they're finally together."
A guy sitting in the front row says, "Excuse me Father, but do you mean her and her first husband, or her and her second husband?"
The priest says, "I mean her legs."
SECOND OPINION
A doctor and his wife are having a terrible fight at the breakfast table.
The doctor gets up in a rage and walks out yelling, "and you are not any good in bed either" as he storms out of the house.
After sometime he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends.
He calls his wife and after at least a dozen rings she answers the phone.
Again irritated the doctor says "what took you so long to answer the phone"? She says, "I was in bed". "In bed this late in the day, doing what"?
"I was getting a second opinion" she replied
THE RODEO POSITION
The first cowboy says his favorite position is the "rodeo."
The other cowboy asks what the position is, and how to do it?
The first cowboy says, "You tell your wife to get on the bed on all fours and then do it doggy style.
Once things start to get under way and she's really enjoying it, lean forward, grab her by her hair and whisper in her ear, 'Your sister likes this position too.' Then try to hang on for 8 seconds."
Link:
http://blog.bitcomet.com/svetlana/post_22038/
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